The curious case of the two-tone pants

One thing you won't find in New York City is a $100 tailored 3 piece corduroy suit. Maybe you'll find a one hundred dollar suit, but it won't hang well on a six and a half foot yeti. I wanted to see how far a hundred dollar bill would go in the way of a tailored suit here in Bangkok. The intern and I went to a few different tailor shops. After the third they were all looking about the same. A room with fabric walls of all colors and patterns. Indian dudes with calculators looking to make a suit of highest quality for 130 dollars. Ok ok ok for you sir 115 dollars. They took measurements and we left.

Well it turns out the only difference between a one hundred dollar suit and a one hundred dollar tailored suit is the tailored one fits better.

It's almost unwearable on account of the bizarre two-tone pants and raw elbow patches. I came out of the dressing room and asked the tailor if he used two different colors on the pants. "NO THIS IS THE SAME COLOR," he said with a certain finality. The intern was sitting on a pink plastic stool. It does not look the same, he said.

Corduroy is a terrible beast to break. You have to match up the grain. Corduroy is an exotic fabric that is harvested from the northern seas in its finished form, much like kelp. It has to be sun-dried for at least a full 12 hours before it can be used in clothing. The length of drying time determines the shade of brown. Many tailors that also have carpentry experience say it's more akin to working with African hardwood than anything from the world of fabric. Knowing this, I let the two-tone pants slide. He'd have to tear them to hell to fix it and this whole thing was primarily an experiment on the relative price of suits. And remember what you learned in biology class: there's no such thing as a failed experiment, you only prove or disprove your hypothesis.

The shop was full of Muslim women with challenging figures getting fitted with conservative jackets to wear to the Mosque. This was no place for a thing so bizarre as a 3-piece corduroy suit. When Stephenson gets here I'll give it another shot at another tailor who is more in tune with the mystic and the unseen.






The pants are cut in a semi-bag fashion popular in the early 90s. Precisely what I specified.






















The shoulder pads are supple and robust.










Here's a shot of me wearing the suit. Thanks Morg.


















In the Orient, suits with raw edges are known as 'suitshi'.



















I asked God to fix my suit. He Cannot.















I smiled and said thanks I love it and the man bagged it up and asked if he could interest me in some formal wear and I said no I have no formal balls to attend.